Dickbutt

assortedcointubes:

sophiaphilemon:

bracha-ncc1701:

sophiaphilemon:

bracha-ncc1701:

MY GIRLFRIEND IS FUCKING INSANE

No it would be instantaneous and then your body would float around those big colorful nebulas and you could get to other galaxies and maybe become part of a moon or get incinerated in a star or fall into a black hole.

You could become part of an asteroid and impact on a moon and your microscopic dust remains are scattered all over the crater.

You could become part of a star and undergo nuclear fission and turn into hydrogen and your body is a tiny fraction of the process of the star and you make light for the universe and then the star ages and your atoms get turned into iron and then the star goes supernova and you’re spewed across the universe as space dust.

You could land of a kind-of habitable planet and your DNA survives as you start to decompose and in a few million years the primitive life forms of your body become science’s greatest mystery for humankind.

You could be found by an alien civilization who’s also wondering ‘are we alone in the universe’ and suddenly they know they’re not because woah processed materials and tools and crazy-developed processing centers woah and then in a couple thousand years they make first contact because of the space-travelling cultural revolution your corpse prompted in their society and the humans of the future go ‘how did you get all these spaceships and junk’ and they reverently pull out your body and you are interred with great fanfare and people make you statues and holidays and stuff.

Your body could end up literally anywhere in the universe and you’d be the first human there because who said you had to be alive huh?

SPACE

What is wrong with you

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

image

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: cockedtail 6 hours ago with 104,943 notes . reblog

and this is why I’m a bigger Dreamworks fan; try again Disney

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: assassinandthecaptain 6 hours ago with 1,995 notes . reblog

clonesandgallifrey:

beckyb1329:

southernrepublicangirl:

What you are telling her is that in real life there are rules. There is a time and a place for everything.

School is a learning environment, not one where you can walk around half naked because you feel like it. 

The same goes for boys who sag their pants or where tank tops. They have to change as well. The only difference is that those boys have the maturity to realize that it’s their own fault for wearing clothes they know are against the dress code instead of blaming it on the opposite gender. 

Okay, let me just tell you something. You’re a girl. Go fucking look in the teen girls section and try to find a pair of shorts that are finger length or four inches above the knees, especially if you have long legs. Let me tell you, it isn’t easy. I went school shopping and I couldn’t find a single pair that fit that. I sweat like crazy, and I don’t want to be wearing jeans all summer in a school with no air conditioning. When I played soccer, I couldn’t even wear a sports bra and shorts to it, because it was ‘inappropriate,’ but I saw all of the guys going around shirtless. Now, tell me, what’s wrong with this picture.

Unless I go shop in the males section, it’s hard to find a shirt that isn’t low cut and/or wide cut, so no. I have good size breasts, so wearing womens’ shirts that are cut up to the neck, my breasts hurt by the end of the day. 

So fuck these damn double standards. I’ve seen boys in school with their pants sagging and not getting said anything about it. I wore a sweater that was a bit wider at the neck, and showed my bra strap, and I was told that it was inappropriate. Oh shit, I wear a bra so that my nipple don’t show? Yeah, that’s for men, too. 

I am tired of this, but I’ll be forced to continue to do it, because as a young girl, I don’t get any say in it, because no one cares what we say. Fuck it. 

preach it

via: artemisfowlstolemysoul / source: facebook.com 6 hours ago with 553 notes . reblog

zamii070:

vantasarcastic:

and now we wait

i’ve been called upon 

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: vantasarcastic 6 hours ago with 11,739 notes . reblog

heliotrooper:

AND HERE WE HAVE MY BIGGEST FUCKING PET PEEVE

via: satan-pie / source: moosekleenex 6 hours ago with 222,600 notes . reblog
via: the-meta / source: rvbtexts 6 hours ago with 857 notes . reblog

surprisebitch:

twophoenixfeathers:

whoop there it is

truth tea has been spilled

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: twophoenixfeathers 6 hours ago with 256,677 notes . reblog

kangaya:

i changed my mind about the proposal ask

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: kangaya 6 hours ago with 15,406 notes . reblog

autisticaradia:

questbedhead:

tenfootpolesociety:

shavingryansprivates:

why he lick me

THIS IS SUPER COOL THOUGH IF YOU UNDERSTAND HORSES. LIKE THAT NIPPING IS A GROOMING BEHAVIOR HORSES DO TO BOND AND TO MAINTAIN AND IMPROVE SOCIAL BONDS. SO THAT HORSE IS BASICALLY TREATING THE CAT AS PART OF THE HERD AND SUSTAINING THE FRIENDLY BOND.

IT IS SAYING, “this tiny horse is very tiny but we are friends. Look at my tiny friend.”

Horses and cats get along really well actually! Cats in barns scare away all the rats and mice that frighten the horses. SO it’s less like the horse accepting it into the ‘herd’ as the horse saying ‘thank you, brave warrior, for protecting me from the scary chitter beasts.’ 

via: satan-pie / source: onlylolgifs 6 hours ago with 274,929 notes . reblog

inspired by

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: cinderfell 6 hours ago with 5,475 notes . reblog
you know if sburb actually was real and we all started playing can you imagine how pissed off all the other fandoms would be

hellfirehotchkiss:

The fucking world would be ending and they’d be like

OF ALL THE FUCKING FANDOMS IN THE WORLD TO ACTUALLY GET THEIR STORY TO BE REAL AND ACTUALLY GET TO LIVE IT IT FUCKING HAD TO BE THEM

I COULD BE IN A TARDIS OR AT HOGWARTS OR BE A MAGICAL GIRL AND MAKE A CONTRACT OR BE THE KEYBLADE MASTER OKAY I COULD FUCKING BE SAILOR MOON

BUT NO I’M DYING IN A METEOR APOCALYPSE BECAUSE OF ALL THE FANDOMS

IT HAD TO BE HOMESTUCK

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: luckyra88it 6 hours ago with 42,218 notes . reblog
24 Things That Secretly Turn Her On

mindmackenzie:

randumb-shit:

lifejoy21:

Would you say these are accurate? 

24 Things That Secretly Turn Her On

image

Interesting!

Most of this is true

via: psych2go / source: lifejoy21 6 hours ago with 7,350 notes . reblog

previouslygillany:

available as shirt here

via: the-chair-of-the-future / source: previouslygillany 7 hours ago with 2,340 notes . reblog

fangirlarmoire:

justalostnostalgicgeek:

i was waiting for my snack wrap but everything changed when the fire nation attacked 

this looks like something out of a freaking sims game

via: guy / source: 103312 7 hours ago with 402,079 notes . reblog

nbcparksandrec:

fallontonight:

AUBREY PLAZA WANTS TO GIVE YOU ADVICE!

Need a new nickname? Want to know your spirit animal? Need to figure out what to wear tomorrow?

We’re shooting a web video with Aubrey Plaza and she’s going to give you unqualified advice! So submit your questions in our ask box (put “Ask Aubrey Plaza” at the beginning), and yours just might get answered on YouTube! Gooooooooo!

[gif via]

Do you have a question for Aubrey?

via: nbcparksandrec / source: fallontonight 7 hours ago with 1,286 notes . reblog